Most parents in the 21st Century struggle with what it means to “properly parent” their children. The vast majority of parents want to be “friends” with their kids. As a result, they avoid being tough and applying proper discipline which is seen as “old school” in our modern age. In contrast, God warns us in His Word (all throughout that the Bible) that failure to parent biblically leads only to harm to the child and failure on our part as parents.
Today, I want us to take a look at Eli the Priest in 1 Samuel who was very successful in his ministry/vocation but failed as a father to his two sons. As a result, Eli’s two sons were put to death by God himself and most probably ended up in hell as opposed to heaven.
WHY WERE ELI’S SONS BOTH PUT TO DEATH? They were both “priests” and morally and literally abused their authority in light of their own pleasure. They extracted uncooked/uncoiled meat from the people and had sexual relations with the girls assigned to the entrance of the Tent of God.
“Now Eli was very old, and kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all Israel and how they lay with the women who were serving at the entrance of the tent of meeting” (1 Samual 2:22). Furthermore, they by force, took eat the raw meat from the people of Israel before it was cooked or even seared in a pan. The law mandated that the priests could go to the homes of the people and put his fork into the meat and pull out what stuck to the fork. People were happy to share with the priests as the law commanded, but Eli’s two sons (priests) mandated that the meat they took be given to them without being cooked which was an abomination to the law and the Lord. The bottom line is that Eli’s sons both abused the office of priest for their own pleasure and gain. In response, God said the following to Samuel, His prophet regarding Eli’s two sons:
“12 On that day I will fulfill against Eli all that I have spoken concerning his house, from beginning to end. 13 And I declare to him that I am about to punish his house forever, for the iniquity that he knew, because his sons were blaspheming God, and he did not restrain them” (1 Samuel 3:12-13).
What did God mean by telling Samuel that Eli, as a father/parent, Eli failed to “RESTRAIN” his two sons who were high priests? The word “RESTRAIN” according to dictionary.com means, to hold back from action; keep in check or under control. The word translated “RETRAIN” occurs only here in the Hebrew Bible. It suggests a rebuke and sets things right by God. At the very least, Eli could have tried more assertively to bring correction upon his sons (and certainly the office of priest Eli appointed them to) and then relieved both of his sons from the position of “priest” had they not complied. Eli could have simply given that role to more godly men. Sadly, we still see this (legacy over doing right by God) playing out much the same in today’s church in some cases.
To his credit, Eli brought the issue up to his sons but he failed to discipline them or relieve them from the office of priest despite their gross biblical/moral violations. “Now Eli was very old, and he kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all Israel and how they lay with the women who were serving at the entrance of the tent of meeting. And he said to them, “Why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all the people. No, my sons; it is no good report that I hear the people of the Lord spreading abroad. If someone sins against a man, God will mediate for him, but if someone sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him? But they would not listen to the voice of their father, “for it was the will of the Lord to put them to death” (1 Samuel 2:22-25).
CONCLUSION: In verse 12, God makes clear that from “the beginning to end”, that God’s judgement would extend from the death of Eli’s sons and continue until the whole prophesy given to Samuel by the “Man of God” (2:27-36) was fulfilled. In verse 13. God makes abundantly clear what God said: “I have told him”: In other words, the message was given through the anonymous “man of God” (2:27-36) through Samuel to Eli. God makes clear, “I will judge”, meaning that no descendants of Eli would serve as priest every again because they “…made themselves vile”. Eli’s sons were supposed to be have been the esteemed priests of God, but they turned their privilege into disaster. As for Eli’s failure to parent properly: “…he did not retrain them”. Eli was a good man and a wonderful High Priest, but a personal failure as a father. Many today will still say that such a statement is “mean hearted and critical”. No, it’s not, it’s the truth. And failure to be honest with oneself and take the energy to raise their children biblically is a violation of God’s Word and the reason why the U.S. and so man cultures around world (especially the children) are suffering.
Most parents in the 21st Century struggle with what it means to “properly parent” their children. Let’s look to God’s Word first as to how to parent rightly. The consequences are high in that we risk losing the next generation. In the end, failure to parent biblically leads only to harm to the child and failure on our part as parents.