Are we called to not be direct with others? Is that bad, morally wrong, or just a reflection of our culture. TODAY, I am going to show you what the Bible says about giving an “APT REPLY” or being too direct.
The Merriam Webster Dictionary defines an APT REPLY as: “able to respond without delay or hesitation or indicative of such ability.” The Collins Dictionary.com defines an apt reply as: “to the point and particularly appropriate.
People have called me direct and one who gives an apt reply at times. The bottom line is that some people don’t like an apt reply. Perhaps it's about accountabililty or not wanting to told anything). By anyone welse (an unteachable spirit).
The bottom line is that we are not to play loosly with words. If we speak truth we can speak and give an “apt reply” instead of some obscure encrypted sentence which is wrong. Some time back, I was sitting with some local folks that taught me that in the reigion, things often mean the opposite of what is literally stated. One gentleman asked the other gentleman if he “might-could consider” doing something. I thought it was a request until he elder gentleman turned to me and said I am going to tech you something about local culture, and went on to explain to me that a request as such if most often not a literal REQUEST but a command to do something. Despite the way in which his words were used, it was still an “apt reply”, and I can respect that. So, is giving an APT REPLY biblical?
PROVERBS 15:23 says “A person finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word!”.
So what does it mean to make an apt reply? To make an apt answer is to address a problem in someone's life according to Proverbs 15:23. Another version of Proverbs 15:23 says it this way: “TO MAKE AN APT ANSWER IS A JOY TO A MAN, AND A WORD IN SEASON, HOW GOOT IT IS!”
The point is this: It should be a “JOY” to give an answer that is helpful to another person, even when it cuts to the core. To be clear, it’s just as important as to “HOW” we say something as to “THAT” we say something. So first, we must say it and then be mindful as to “HOW” we say that helpful truth.
To be clear, there are times when there are right answer is not always appropriate, but it’s still good to give wisdom words to best help the other person make decisions for themself. On the flip side, it is a joy to give a helpful answer to a problem, but it must be spoken in the right time and in the right way. Timing is critical. We must make sure that we are not criticizing the other person out of anger. That would be wrong.
Being a productive and effective parent or leader mandates being able to give an apt answer and being disciplined in your speech; using your words for the benefit and encouragement as well as correction (when needed) of others.
IN CLOSING I want to close with Proverbs 24:26 which says, “AN HONEST ANSWER IS LIKE A KiSS ON THE LIPS”.
The ESV says it this way: “WHOEVER GIVES AN HONEST ANSWER KISSES THE LIPS”.
This saying compares giving “A RIGHT ANSWER” with kissing “THE LIPS”. A right answer is a straightforward, honest response to an inquiry. And in the end, this is called giving an APT ANSWER because such words reflect LOVE, RESPECT, and INTIMACY towards the inquirer, much like a kiss on the lips. And, the greatest sign of affection and respect for another person is to tell the person the truth.
So to answer the question as to is it wrong or bad to give an “APT REPLY?” The answer in summary is a whopping “YES”. We are called biblically to be respectful but direct with others. That is not bad or morally wrong. WHY? Because the greatest sign of affection and respect for another person is to tell the person the truth-and that mandates giving an “apt reply”.